I was finally welcomed into the weird and wacky world of physio Malcolm Stuart on Tuesday night.

A stray Stoke elbow left me with a nasty cut and I could already feel the warm trickle of blood dripping down my face by the time Malcolm reached me. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: Is it a bad one Mal?

Mal: Yeah, quite deep as well.

Me: Whereabouts is the cut?

Mal: Just above your nose.

Me: Then why the hell are you bandaging the top of my head like a mummy?

Mal: Dunno really, but it don't half look good!

Thankfully the doctor took charge of me after the game, although my head was so hard that the needle broke when he tried to apply some stitches! The lads said I looked like Terry Butcher with all those bandages on. The gaffer said I had played like Pat Butcher! Not that the stitches made any difference to my looks! I am from the Danny Cullip and Crossa school of ugly, broken-nosed centre-halves. I don't know what happened to Wicksy, he's far too pretty to be a centre back.

We were all obviously delighted with the three points. Stoke are a very big, strong, well-organised team but we stuck in there and matched them through sheer hard work. Watto proved, yet again, to be the late, late hero. After all the stick I gave him in last week's column I have to reveal he is now simply known as "Golden b*******"!

Some people may say our late winners have been lucky. We prefer to think they merely underline our superior fitness levels, mental strength and steely character. Without wishing to sound like Statto, I can reveal 33 per cent of all Fulham's goals last season came in the last ten minutes. I can't remember many people claiming they were lucky.

Superior fitness was also the main reason behind our recovery at Wrexham. The home side ran out of steam in the last 20 minutes as we upped the tempo. Bobby Z came good on the road after being told to view the North Wales clash as a European fixture rather than a normal away game. Geoff 'Pingu' Pitcher made a very encouraging debut after taking the first 20 minutes to find his flippers, sorry feet! He was very unlucky when he waddled through their defence but narrowly missed the target! Jonesy was very excited about being back in his native homeland and was seen running across the Welsh countryside in his green wellies looking for livestock!

The games continue to come thick and fast. After the centenary celebrations against Bournemouth we travel to Wycombe and Cardiff next week. The trip to South Wales will give us a chance to renew acquaintance with Corky. He's doing a great job down there despite the added pressures and expectations brought about because they have spent millions on new players.

I still find it hard to believe that Corky is a manager. In his playing days he was always the first off the training pitch and was in the bookies or the pub by the time the other players had showered. Then, when he took over as assistant manager at Fulham, the players held him in such high regard that we stripped him naked and locked him in the boot of his car. He has a good football brain though and loved set-pieces. He used to think them up in the Green Man and bring them to training scribbled on the back of a beer mat.

Finally, on behalf of all the lads, I would like to offer sincere condolences to the family and friends of supporter, Robert Eaton, a victim of the American tragedies. The lads have thought and talked of little else over the last ten days. At times it has been difficult to focus the mind on the work in hand, but as professionals we have to try and do the job to the best of our ability. I hope it is what Robert would have wanted.