Royal joy for Brighton school pupils (From The Argus)

• "Ra ra ra! What a joy to have Sophie and especially Edward in our neck of the woods. He's a bit of a hero of mine actually - we share so much in common: I'm going quickly bald, I sponge off the state and have been mainly useless at everything I've tried, and I'm pretty much gay but manage to attract quite good-looking women. Plus I'm very, very good at going around looking at things, appearing moderately interested and then leaving. God bless me! I do a wonderful job."
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