Sussex mum's pain at daughter's tragic destiny

Hayley Okines, 14, has lived beyond her life expectancy Hayley Okines, 14, has lived beyond her life expectancy

The mother of a girl with a rare ageing condition has admitted she considered killing herself and her daughter.

Kerry Okines, 38, said she sank into depression after learning about her daughter Hayley’s condition.

Bexhill High School pupil Hayley, now 14, suffers from the extremely rare condition progeria.

Only 140 people have ever been diagnosed with the illness and sufferers usually die before they reach the age of 13, from heart disease and strokes.

Ms Okines, of Meadow Crescent, Bexhill, said that she sank into depression after learning about her daughter’s tragic destiny.

Darkest thoughts She said she had visions of going into Hayley’s room and finding her dead in bed and “could not imagine how she would cope with the pain of losing her”.

She said that when Hayley was about two-and-a half, she had considered sitting in a car with her daughter and filling it with exhaust fumes.

A short time later she sat with pills and a bottle of vodka – but luckily was found by Hayley’s father Mark Okines, and she attended counselling.

'I don't want to grieve for her while she's still alive'

Speaking to The Argus about her darkest thoughts, Ms Okines said: “I think that a lot of people can relate to what I what I was going through and I want to be open about it, I want to be honest.

“At the time it was too much to bear.

“I didn’t know how to deal with things and enjoy my time with her.

“But now I have learnt how to. I don’t want to grieve for her while she is still alive.

“At the time I didn’t think that the counselling helped but now I realise it did.”

In the past 12 months Hayley has dislocated her hips six times and is now wheelchair-bound.

But her mother described her as a “typical teenager” and said she had been able to return to school four weeks ago.

Ms Okines added: “It is very hard seeing her not walking.”

“I look at her Facebook page and people’s kind comments really mean a lot.”

She said Hayley’s siblings, Louis, ten, and Ruby, seven, were a great support for their sister.

Comments(10)

tooned_in says...
11:17am Thu 26 Jul 12

Although I cannot begin to imagine all the stress and upset this family is going through Im sending them love and very best wishes...Hope Hayley is up and about in the very near future, Im sure the whole of sussex is sending you their best wishes too!

mimseycal says...
11:42am Thu 26 Jul 12

Onward and upward Hayley! You are all very fortunate to have each other.

Hovite says...
11:47am Thu 26 Jul 12

Goldenwight; Yes there is something missing, and that something is between your ears.

You should be ashamed of yourself for even posting a heartless comment like that on here, but I hope it makes you feel better.

Hovite says...
12:32pm Thu 26 Jul 12

Thanks for removing Goldenwight’s post Argus, you can remove my post as well now that is out of context.

plantwoman says...
1:10pm Thu 26 Jul 12

tooned_in wrote:
Although I cannot begin to imagine all the stress and upset this family is going through Im sending them love and very best wishes...Hope Hayley is up and about in the very near future, Im sure the whole of sussex is sending you their best wishes too!
Just about covers it, I think. Well said!

Josie301 says...
2:35pm Thu 26 Jul 12

I met Hayley in Waterstones Priory Meadow Hastings. I had a chat with her, she let me take her photo for my magazine I founded - Ebb & Flow (The New Voice) and edit. She is such a lovely girl. I met her mother a few years ago, at one of the local writing groups I attended at the same time, being still a member. At the time, I had no idea she was Hayleys mother. I wish them the greatest time of their lives now and in the future...take care...Josie

Chipstick41 says...
2:46pm Thu 26 Jul 12

Thank God Goldenwight's comments have been removed. Good to see The Editor's actually doing something today.

What a brave family, and a very brave little girl. I wish you all the very best for the future. Enjoy the weather, and have a very lovely summer.

Nightshade says...
11:02pm Thu 26 Jul 12

I first saw Hayley on The Jeremy Kyle show, she was brilliant on there. I am glad that her mum didn't give in to her sad feelings, she would have deprived the world of a special little girl.

NickBrt says...
12:15pm Fri 27 Jul 12

What a lovely little girl, what a beautiful smile. Best of luck to the family.

anniebell9466 says...
7:43pm Sun 12 Aug 12

thankful for the strength God has given you to endure through all the trying times..You and your daughter have been an inspiration to so many! I'm here in Killen, Al lifting your family up in my prayers...Blessings to you all for blessing us all

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