A woman from Peacehaven has turned the traditional idea of fostering on its head.

Usually seen as a short-term arrangement, Marian Ferguson has been a foster mother to Brian for 31 years.

Brian, 39, who has Down's syndrome, came to the Ferguson family as an eight-year-old and established himself as such a big part of the family they began arrangements for him to stay as he was coming up to his 18th birthday.

The landmark birthday was usually the point at which foster carers and the children they cared for parted company, but Marian and her late husband Peter, who died in February, and their two sons, who are one and two years older than Brian, couldn't let Brian go.

They made the highly unusual request to the social services that he stayed, and 31 years later, he continues to live happily with Marian.

“He would have ended up in a home,” says Marian. “In fact, it was partly at the insistence of our two sons – who are only a couple of years older than Brian and who have always treated him as a brother – that we wanted to carry on looking after Brian. We are a tightly knit family and I love Brian as my own son and I love having him around the house. He treats me as his mother and there will always be a loving home for him here.”

The family's decision to continue the fostering arrangement into Brian's adult life came in the face of opposition and some negative attitudes towards people with Down's syndrome.

“There were people who simply couldn’t understand why I had chosen to look after Brian,” recalls Marian. “Things have definitely changed for the better since then but in those days, many people thought Down’s syndrome was something to be hidden away rather than spoken about. People at bus stops would say things like, 'People like him should be in a home'. But everyone in the family defended Brian. Our sons would immediately cut off from anyone who didn't like Brian, and that has applied to their life partners, too.”

Marian first met Brian in 1983 in Scotland, through a scheme called Be My Parent, run by the British Association for Adoption and Fostering. She had previously run a children’s home in Coldean and wanted to do something to help children with disabilities. While she was bolstered by support from her family, she also received help from a scheme called Shared Lives, run by Brighton and Hove City Council. It links up vulnerable adults with carers who provide support and accommodation in their own home.

“The scheme has been one of the best things that has happened to me,” says Marian. “I think Shared Lives has been great for Brian as well. It’s given him the love, support and stability of a family that he might not otherwise have had.”

The scheme is looking for more carers and Marian is urging people to sign up. “My philosophy in life is to give things a go,” she says. “Even if you only give a little bit of your time to something or someone it’s still a great thing to do.”

Brian has what he describes as “a lovely life”. He “loves” his mum, saying, “She makes me feel happy.” He spends time gardening at their home in Peacehaven, where he is growing lettuces, tomatoes and cucumbers in the greenhouse, and he frequently visits his girlfriend at a centre in Hove run by the council for people with learning disabilities. With support from the council’s adult social care team, he attends groups on most days of the week, including a film group and history project, a recycling scheme, and a council-supported scheme, where he carries out basic clerical work on Wednesdays. Marian’s youngest son also takes Brian out most weekends, and in his spare time, Brian loves Google Earth on his computer and takes many pictures on his beloved phone.

Life with Brian hasn't always been easy for Marian and her family. As an adult, Brian has had some serious health problems, and the death of Marian’s husband – the man Brian treated as his father – was a big blow for both of them.

“If anything, though, my husband’s death has brought us even closer together,” says Marian.