For those of us either a) not interested or b) not invited to London Fashion Week, there’s another prestigious event taking place this February, in the comfort and splendour of your very own home. It’s only ruddy 80’s season on Film 4!

And they’ve done themselves pretty damned proud with the line-up. I am disappointed by the marked absence of Hugh Grant’s first foray into erotica, Bitter Moon, but ‘tis a mere niggle when you consider that the following are on offer:

Crocodile Dundee – A feisty reporter with absolutely no idea of how to dress for the bush jets down under to meet leathery local hero Paul Hogan and learn his ways. Then she entices him back to New York, under the guise of following up on her original story, but really so she can continue to indulge her inexplicable attraction to the sun-damaged rogue. The joke is most definitely on our hero, the man is hard pushed to flush a toilet without supervision, how will he cope in this urban jungle? In a relentless comedy fashion, that’s how. And accompanied by a sizzling saxaphonic soundtrack.

Three Men and a Baby – a trio of bawdy batchelors, enjoying their disposable incomes in their ridiculously large apartment, are taught the true meaning of life by the arrival of a howling infant, which one of them appears to have fathered without due care and attention. Suddenly they’re forced to swap hot dates for sterilising nipples and struggling to work out which end of a child the nappy goes on. Men. They’re pretty stupid aren’t they?

Romancing the Stone – A dappy romantic novelist is forced to travel to Columbia to rescue her sister from the clutches of your typical South American drug barons. Luckily for her, she bumps into a bristling hero with the jungle smarts and ulterior motives to make it worth teaming up and setting off on a comedy adventure. They are hotly pursued, by the one, the only, the never fails to be amusing, Danny frickin’ Devito, on top form as he performs one prat fall after another. (I can’t help but notice that Devito is also shoe-horned into other films starring Kathleen Turner and Michael Douglas – The Jewel of the Nile, War of the Roses - did they adopt him or something?)

Beaches – You won’t want to cry, you’ll feel dirty and a bit used afterwards but nevertheless, after experiencing the tumultuous and lifelong friendship between the big bouncy C C Bloom and the motherless society princess Hilary, only for one of them to go and die, on a beach, at sunset, from a trembling heart condition whose only symptom appears to be a slight pallor….unless you have a heart like a pumice stone, this will make you cry. Bette Midler’s singing, no the other hand, will just make you very, very angry.

Working Girl – Feisty working class kinda girl with truly appalling hair, lops it off, buys a pair of killer heels, throws up a few ideas to get the big cheese interested, sleeps with aforementioned big cheese just to make sure he’s all taking her seriously et voila. Career!

Dolly mixture such as this can be found every night until 28th February on Film 4.