AN APPLE a day keeps the doctor away – and the taxman too if recent reports are to be believed.

Last week I doubt I was the only one left saying “core blimey” after the tech giant was told to pay up to 13 billion Euros to the Irish government.

To some, not least those in Silicon Valley, such demands left a sour taste in the mouth. But for the consumer, it opened up a whole new argument on tax avoidance and whether in this globalised world, any governmental authority can tame businesses operating beyond borders.

Apple’s success story is beyond incredible – growing from an idea in one man’s head to an all-consuming brand that has a presence in every country in the world. As I am constantly reminded, when you buy into Apple, you buy into a way of life – a way of life that holds itself up to be smug, cool and a little bit better than everyone else.

Much to my friends’ shock, I recently made the transition to become the owner of Apple’s main product, the iPhone.

For many years I had been seemingly the one person left who stood steadfastly by a big black boxy brick masquerading as a phone.

But the Apple crush couldn’t be resisted for ever – and now I’m among the millions who are seeing part of their monthly fee going straight into the back pocket of shareholders, rather than into the coffers of the taxman.

What has been fascinating is how the whole debate around Apple has got to this stage.

When the firm set up a base in Ireland in the 1980s no one could have predicted how big Apple would get.

As things started to develop, a behind-closed-doors agreement was struck between the Irish government, keen to do everything it could to bring jobs to the country, and the conglomerate, keen to make as much money as possible. Soon all of its European business was funnelled through the country.

A small amount was paid to the Irish taxman – 0.005 per cent of the total to be exact – and the rest wired back to the United States, to be dished out to shareholders and stashed in the Caribbean in case of a rainy day. At least that was until the crusading EU commissioner for competition Margrethe Vestager took aim. After months of investigating, a ruling was passed that Apple must pay the tax it has so carefully been avoiding.

The fallout has been vast – and at its heart is a showdown between perhaps the world’s most-loved corporation and Europe’s most hated organisation. What is interesting though is that two months after Britain turned its back on Brussels, public opinion seems firmly to be on the side of the bureaucrats. Tim Cook, Apple’s CEO, tried his best to remind people that the ruling was eroding individual country’s rights to set their own rules, a hefty swipe at sovereignty.

I don’t blame the company for the sticky situation it faces; after all, it has simply seen a good business deal and exploited it to the max. The odd thing is quite how this super smooth corporate that does everything else so well got this issue so wrong. Consumers will stick by Apple, I’ve no doubt about that. But this episode has left it battered and bruised.

The only body which remains completely on Cook’s side is weirdly the very organisation that will benefit from the 13 million Euro windfall – the Irish government. It would rather keep its reputation as a place which is rather liberal on corporation tax alive than bow to the overarching pressures of Brussels.

Quite how long it can last, I do not know. Perhaps it will be the start of an Eire-xit, as our cousins across the sea seek a divorce from the EU. If it does, then that will be a sad day for the little man, to every individual that diligently pays their taxes to ensure that society continues to operate on all levels. If Ireland doesn’t want the money, then here’s a suggestion – why not give a rebate to those who have bought the products? It may not help keep the taxman away – but it will be a nice little sweetener for those that remain committed to the company come what may.

The Argus:

A COMMUTING new for me last week. No, not a Southern service that ran exactly to time.

While slightly red-eyed on Friday en route to the capital, a woman boarded the train with a bag filled with handmade goodies.

The sandwich was quickly scoffed and then out from the Mary Poppins bag came a large jam jar full of freshly pressed homemade juice. The mix of orange, beetroot and weeds certainly looked interesting. But it only made me want a bacon buttie even more.