So parents could face fines of up to £1,000 and community service sentences if their children are late for school.

BBC Radio Sussex asked me if I would participate in an interview about it earlier this week. I was on air with an ex headteacher. Needless to say, we had different views on the matter.

We are often late to school in the morning. I have a five-year old who only talks Minion language at home, plays dead, even when being dragged from bed to the kitchen table.

If I ask her to go and get her bag, she comes back with a piece of Lego and the pet tortoise. She refuses hats, coats, sun-cream, hairbrushes, logic.

When I explained this to the former headteacher I realised I might as well have told him the dog ate my homework. He went on to describe parents so lazy they don’t even bother getting out of their pyjamas at drop off.

Most mornings I will be wearing something I slept in the night before, and I said as much.

By the time I’ve dragged the children from their slumber, forced some cereal down them (I don’t like Weetabix any more, I want warm milk, she’s got my special spoon etc) and got them dressed (It’s mufti day, I don’t want to wear a summer dress, she’s got my socks on, knickers make me itchy) and teeth brushed (that toothpaste is too spiky, she has my toothbrush, the flannel is too hot/cold) we are already late, and I’m exhausted.

I have to lay sweets on the counter as bait, then hide behind the fridge door with the sun-cream, finger on the trigger to attack.

Inevitably, we have to double back on our walk to school, because someone is not wearing pants (not me, OK, sometimes me), or we forgot the dogs or whatever random item the school demanded needed taking that day ( a plain green T-shirt, a diorama of the village, empty milk bottles, a medieval costume, water bottle, gold shoes, ingredients to make Roman bread).

To people without children, or children who actually do as they are told, I probably sound like a terrible parent.

To you I say, it took me ten attempts to pass my driving test, I obviously don’t take to things easily. If you think you could do better, please come to my house at 7am and show me how. Bring milk, we’ve always run out.

Fining parents for late drop-offs seems like the council scraping the barrel for new ways to make money.

The head spoke of parents who flaunt the rules and arrive when they like, disrupting the school and showing a lack of respect for the public money used to fund education.

He mentioned that parents could choose to home educate if they did not feel they could commit to the requirements of school times.

I’ve only seen shame and panic on the faces of late parents.

Being late/unable to control your child/get a handle on life does not make us mothers proud. It’s rare when one of us is not sobbing in the playground and we are not pansies. There are ex-lawyers, architects, actresses and teachers among us, but having a child is the ultimate leveller.

It can bring you to your knees quicker that Ryan Gosling’s dancing in La La Land.

People need helping, not fining if they are struggling to get to school on time.

Visions of us mothers sleeping late on satin sheets and refusing to leave for school until we’ve poached the perfect eggs is wrong. Go in to any house with kids in at 8.29am. You won’t hear “Oh let them eat cake darling, we’ll go when we fancy”. You’ll hear “Put your xxxxxxx shoes on, we are going to be late”.

In other news a cyclist landed in hospital after an anti-cycling vigilante laid barbed wire on cycle track in Stanmer Park.

Rider Riley Alexander said he wasn’t shocked by the trap which is called trail sabotage in the cycling world: “I’m not massively surprised – it’s getting to the time of year where trail sabotage does happen.

“There are walkers who think mountain bikers shouldn’t be anywhere near there.”

Well who died and made walkers king?

Setting barbed wire traps for cyclists seems insane, surely they are also setting traps for innocent wildlife and each other? They are bikes, not bombs.

Comments from readers included “I can’t stand cyclists but this is appalling on so many levels.

“Anyone who does this should be ashamed of themselves” and “It’s unfortunate that the few cyclists who gob off and stick fingers up make it such hard work for the others. A little harmony please.”

They must have walked past my five-year old cycling to school.