Couples want to see more same sex foster parents

Simon Flamson, 48, realised he wanted to foster when he was 18 years old.

The Hove resident said: “I worked in a children’s hospital and one day I met a little boy who was up for adoption. I remember thinking that I would love to be able to help him but I lived in a tiny flat and I simply wasn’t in an emotionally stable state. I never forgot that little boy.”

Simon married his partner James Sawyer, 39, four years ago and the pair agreed they were ready to start the foster care process. They have since cared for seven children but admitted it has not always been easy. Simon said: “Our longest placement was a five-year-old who stayed with us for two years.

“He’d had an incredibly difficult first few years to his life.

“When he arrived he couldn’t walk straight, he couldn’t use a knife and fork and, most distressingly, he couldn’t or wouldn’t laugh.

“It took us about two months to get him to a stage where he would simply smile and laugh.

“It was so incredible to see how much he changed with some love, encouragement and stability. One of the best bits for us was watching as he became proud of himself and his achievements and seeing him expressing himself.”

Tanya Roberts, 36, and Sophie Smith, 30, of Brighton, also dreamed of caring for children.

Tanya said: “From an early age I knew I wanted to work with children, especially children with learning difficulties.

“Deciding to foster is such a big decision and I wanted to ensure I was ready, stable and able to provide a safe and secure home to a child.

“I met Sophie and, incredibly, we had the same dreams.

“We never felt as though having our own children was the right thing to do when there are so many who need a home, so we applied together.”

Three years ago they “took the leap” and have since cared for nine children.

They now want to encourage other same sex couples to foster. Tanya said: “Stand up proud for who you are and that will come through to the children who you look after so they can do the same in their lives.

“We need to break down the barriers and the idea that same-sex couples are not entitled to do the same as a heterosexual couples.

“You need to ask yourself, as a human being, am I able to do this job?

“We have to stand up strong and believe in ourselves.

“We are doing this job just like anyone else and just as well as anyone else and that is all fostering agencies are looking for.”

Simon also offered advice for same sex couples looking to foster.

He said: “It’s also important to remember why you’re fostering in the first place.

“These children need loving homes and your sexuality shouldn’t come into that.”

Andy Purnell, manager at Orange Grove Fostercare, said: "There is such a shortage of foster carers and we actively spend time looking for people who are going to give children the care they deserve.

"We often get asked if same-sex couples are allowed to foster, which sounds crazy in this day and age.

"We welcome anyone who has the capacity to open their home to a child who desperately needs their love and support, their sexuality doesn't come in to it and same-sex couples have exactly the same rights to foster as heterosexual couples."