I HAVE never conformed to the vagaries of fashion and never intend to either. What’s the point?

When it comes to leisure wear for a man the rules are simple and I have stuck to them since I was a teenager, which is a long time ago.

Basically, buy two pairs of Levi’s, several rock T-shirts, flip-flops and trainers. Job done.

When it comes to work it is even more simple. Buy two suits, five smart shirts, a few ties and a couple of pairs of brogues, one pair black, the other brown.

Unfortunately, however, it appears that this is no longer deemed to be cool.

Wearing items from “last year’s collection” is a sin of epic magnitude.

Well call me old fashioned at this juncture, but when did the style of men’s Levi’s last change? They tend to stick to the same formula and it is a winning one too, which is why millions of pairs are sold every year.

I have a pair of 501s that are more than 20 years old and they are still going strong.

Ditto with T-shirts. Buy ones emblazoned with the logos of Led Zeppelin, the Beatles, Doors or Pink Floyd and your can’t go wrong. In fact you will be forever cool.

However, time has now caught up with me and I have had to embrace being uncool.

I don’t have enough hair to adopt a trendy style, if I don’t shave for a couple of months I look like Father Christmas and to be honest comfort rules.

If it means fading into the background in comparison to the young, gifted and beautiful then so be it.

Fortunately I grew up in an era when your “look” was not scrutinised incessantly on social media.

Youth is not always to be envied and the pressure to fit in has never been more intense. Everyone wants their 15 minutes of fame, whether it be on reality television shows or by becoming a social media “influencer”.

That influence can be huge too with some of the major players having millions of followers.

The latest fad which seems to have enraptured the younger male members of the city over the course of winter is to wear tight-fitting shorts, regardless of the temperature, which begs the question “why on Earth would you”?

Sod fashion as far as I am concerned. When temperatures plummet and I venture out it is with a thick coat, several layers and sensible trousers, augmented with a pair of comfortable boots. Then make your way to the nearest boozer, order a drink and take up a lengthy residence as close as possible to an open fire. Warmth assured.

When it comes to listening to music I remain in the Dark Ages... namely the Sixties.

I wouldn’t know the difference between Billie Eilish and Billy J Kramer and I’m glad I don’t.

At Chateau Mayo there is a steady musical diet of Beatles, Rolling Stones, the Kinks and the Doors on the turntable. I don’t understand the appeal of Ed Sheeran and think Simon Cowell is the devil incarnate.

The television is barely switched on, especially as the terrestrial channels seem to think that viewers can be appeased with a steady diet of reality shows and endless repeats.

Admittedly I have succumbed to Amazon Prime but then its output is far superior to the BBC and it only costs £7.99 per month. What is not to like?

Social media leaves me cold. I have no desire to be on Facebook, hardly ever post anything on Twitter and barely know what Instagram is. I have also never taken a selfie and I wouldn’t know how to.

Mobile phones are a complete menace, especially when you upgrade to a “smartphone”. I have got used to my Huawei but apparently the Chinese tech giant has upset Donald Trump so no doubt it is only a matter of time before owning one will lead to being incarcerated in the nearest prison for being a Communist sympathiser.

I briefly owned a Kindle but decided I prefer good old fashioned books. The three iPods I own are simply gathering dust now I have returned to collecting vinyl with a vengeance.

It is said you become comfortable in middle age and settle for the status quo... and I have.

When it comes to possessions I don’t need any more. In fact I have too many as it is.

I don’t have a wishlist other than hoping for a big lottery win which will enable me to buy an Aston Martin and an imposing gaff in Arundel.

Late middle age isn’t bad at all actually as long as you have a roof over your head and food to put on the table.

Happiness is priceless. It is as simple as that.