In response to Sue Osmond (Letters, March 31), as an engineer, it's a long time since I read anything as funny as this.

I think Sue must be either wellmeaning or having a laugh.

I wouldn't want any of the English Channel in my bath, it's salty, it's dirty and it's cold.

As for washing your car and cleaning your home with it, I suggest she collects a bucketful and does it first, then notes the result.

If Sue wants to give her plumber a laugh as well, she should mention her suggestion to him.

He will gently explain, possibly with a bit of plumber's language, why it's not possible to do as she suggests.

Southern Water has spent years putting sewage into our section of the Channel and are still doing so - leave it to the fish.

In a country less than 700 miles long and a world power, we are told, we should have a water network.

This is the sort of thing John Prescott should be seeing to instead of imposing housing expansion on an infrastructure which has difficulty coping with the existing population.

-Mike Timberlake, Hurstpierpoint