While Britain is optimistically pinning its Eurovision hopes on a rapping 40-something man wearing stonewash denim, the best place to watch the car crash is probably The

Duke Of York's.

Where else are you going to get a live message from Terry Wogan, a turn from ginger Scouse Sonia and chatter and filth from leather lederhosen-wearing cabaret acts? Certainly not sitting in front of your telly at home.

Now in its fifth year, the cinema's Eurovision Party is promising to be the, "loudest, campest and most fabulously flamboyant party ever".

The evening will be presided over by Strictly Come Dancing's Jason Wood with the warm-up and interlude filled with song and Eurovision reminiscences from Sonia (she came second in 1993 with Better The Devil You Know). Eurovision party regulars Topping and Butch, whose act once led one reviewer to say, "The vulgarity knob frequently hits 11", will also be there.

A 326-strong audience can sit in the Duke's, smug in the knowledge they're officially watching the contest on the biggest screen in the UK. You are encouraged to dress up in support of the country of your choice.

While many will be hoping for a repeat of 1997 when Katrina And The Waves won for Britain, it really doesn't matter if Daz Sampson from Stockport and his song Teenage Life (something he can probably remember very little about) doesn't scoop the first prize: The audience at the Duke's get to award their own points and pick their own winner.

Let's just hope they can come to an amicable decision unlike Serbia-Montenegro, now facing a £10,000 fine and a three-year ban from the contest after pulling out over tactical voting claims, and Finland which has been left divided about its chainsaw-wielding death-metal entry Lordi.

Starts 7pm. Tickets cost £35, or £50 for VIP seats which includes food, champagne reception and discounted entry to the Revenge Eurovision Night. Call 0870 551228.