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Ah, Valentine's Day—the holiday that throws every coupled-off person into a deep panic as they desperately search for something that sums up all of their love into one perfectly-wrapped gift.

And while we might not know what that one gift is (although we have a few pretty good ideas), we definitely know what it isn't. A.k.a. one of these 10 things, which are the worst gifts you can give for Valentine's Day, from the cheesy to the cliché. But fear not—we're also offering suggestions on what to buy instead so both you and your significant other end up happy.

1. An oversized teddy bear
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Teddy bear. Credit: Hazal AK/Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Teddy bear. Credit: Hazal AK/Getty Images Leave the stuffed animals for the kids, please and thank you. Your partner is much more likely to enjoy curling up with this cosy weighted blanket than a creepy massive teddy bear, after all. We recommend this one from Gravity because it's super soft to the touch and provides just the right amount of pressure that's comforting without being suffocating.

What to give instead: Gravity Blanket from Gravity for £149

2. Heart-shaped jewellery
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Heart-shaped jewellery. Credit: Alex Shebanov/Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Heart-shaped jewellery. Credit: Alex Shebanov/Getty Images You do not need to buy someone a heart-shaped necklace (or bracelet or earrings) to show your love for them. In fact, not only do you not need to, but you probably shouldn't. Opt for classy over cheesy with something more along the lines of this popular Kate Spade initial pendant necklace. It's personal yet understated and elegant—exactly what a romantic gesture should be.

What to give instead: Kate Spade New York One in a Million Initial Pendant Necklace for £55

3. A candle
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Candles. Credit: Medea83/Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Candles. Credit: Medea83/Getty Images Sorry, are you looking for Valentine's Day gifts or gifts for your Aunt Sue's 70th birthday? Nothing against candles, of course, but they're not exactly long-lasting or personal. A similar but better pick would be one of our favourite essential oil diffusers, which your partner can customise with their scents of choice and which has enough capacity that it can run for 11 hours straight before it needs to be refilled.

What to give instead: InnoGear 150ml Diffuser from Amazon for £17.99

4. Flowers (and nothing else)
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Fresh flowers. Credit: Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Fresh flowers. Credit: Getty Images That bouquet of red roses is a lovely gesture but in a week (or less), all your partner will have left is some dried petals and wilted stems. Instead, swap out the fresh flowers for a live plant, which will last a little longer (like your relationship, hopefully). 

What to give instead: A live plant from Bloom Box Club

5. Cheap lingerie
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Cheap lingerie. Credit: Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Cheap lingerie. Credit: Getty Images I understand—and appreciate—where your head is at here, but know that no woman will understand—or appreciate—it when they're wearing itchy, too-tight, poorly-made undergarments. Your better bet in that department is one of these comfortable and popular Millie Lace Bralette’s

What to give instead: Millie Lace Bralette for £15

6. A night out at the movies
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Movie tickets. Credit: RGStudios/Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Movie tickets. Credit: RGStudios/Getty Images While there's an exception to this one (looking at you, parents who need a night away from the kids), spending upwards of £50 on sub-par movie tickets just to eat sub-par popcorn (which will cost you another £20 a pop) and sit in sub-par seats isn't exactly the most romantic of evenings. All of that money would be better spent on the streaming service everyone's obsessed with lately: Disney+. You can curl up on the couch and watch all of your favourite flicks together in the comfort of your own home. And let's be honest, given the current Covid situation, none of us are going to the cinema anytime soon. 

What to give instead: A one-year subscription to Disney+ for £59.99 

7. Household appliances
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Appliances. Credit: Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Appliances. Credit: Getty Images Sure, they may really want a new vacuum or a new toaster. But February 14th is Valentine's Day, it's not a housewarming party. If you're intent on a more practical gift, however, at least make it something the both of you can use and enjoy together—like a meal kit delivery service

What to give instead: Gousto starting at £6.25/meal 

8. A bottle of wine
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Wine. Credit: Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Wine. Credit: Getty Images Unless it's the end-all-be-all of wines, that bottle of merlot is something you pick up on your way home from work on a Friday night—not something you give your one and only for Valentine's Day. Take it up a notch with a boozy subscription service like Savage Vines, which will deliver a selection of vinos to their doorstep every month.

What to give instead: A Savage Vines subscription starting at £99.95

9. A generic gift card
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Gift card. Credit: Sitthiphong/Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Gift card. Credit: Sitthiphong/Getty Images Nothing says "I love you" quite like a VISA gift card you grabbed at the supermarket (along with a plain Valentine's Day card, of course)... Even if you forgot about the holiday and it's February 14th and you're empty-handed, don't worry. Rather than settling for a gift card, treat your partner to a custom made card from Etsy, tailored to their individual interests. Whether they're obsessed with The Great British Bake Off or The Mandalorian, you can find a gorgeous Valentine's Day card that's perfect for showing your love.

What to give instead: Valentine's Day card from Etsy 

10. A cliché gift basket
The Argus: Worst Valentine's Day gifts: Gift set. Credit: Getty ImagesWorst Valentine's Day gifts: Gift set. Credit: Getty Images All those pre-arranged baskets of soaps, candies, lotions, and other assorted knick-knacks are always the things that go on sale after Valentine's Day—because everyone knows they're awful gifts. If you really can't decide on just one thing for your partner, at least get them a subscription box that they'll actually use and look forward to month after month. 
What to give instead: Gillette Shave Club starting at £11.50/month

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