Although I have lived in Cornwall for the past 18 years, I still have family ties in Sussex and feel morally bound to leak information which will affect anyone intending to holiday here this year.

Devolution will be granted to Cornwall on April 1.

As from that date, Cornwall will be a separate country and the flag of St Piran will proudly fly in Brussels as it becomes a Member State of the EU. General elections will follow to elect a Cornish Parliament and MEPs.

Customs points will be set up along the Tamar river. A visa will be required to enter Cornwall at a cost of £75, available from most post offices, for a limited stay of 14 days.

To eradicate the long traffic hold-ups we have suffered for years, caravans will be banned from our roads and Cornwall will adopt the continental system of driving on the right-hand side.

However, to assist visitors from England, they will be allowed to drive on the left.

To honour Cornwall's delicacy, the Cornish pasty, known as an "oggie", a new currency of that name will be used instead of sterling. The exchange rate has not yet been fixed but all banks will supply.

The present toll charge of £1 to exit Cornwall over the Tamar bridge will be increased to £50 each way for visitors. Cornwall will change to a ten-hour clock, with 10 hours a day incorporating 100 minutes an hour and 100 seconds to a minute.

"Grockles", as holidaymakers are known, are advised to obtain a Cornish language dictionary, as only Cornish will be spoken here.

To celebrate Independence Day, Trago Mills will offer 100 per cent discount on all goods purchased, plus a free Cornish pasty.

-Ken Pearson, St Mellion, Cornwall