What two luxury items would you take with you to the jungle if you were on I'm A Celebrity - Get Me Out Of Here, asked daughter.

The question came as we curled up to watch her new favourite programme last week.

"I don't know, what would you take?" I replied. "I would take my favourite lip gloss and my new eye shadow so I could look pretty if there were any cute boys there she said.

"I don't think I'd bother with the makeup," I mused. "I'd take a photo of you and your dad and a notebook and pen."

"You couldn't take a pen," she said. "That would be a third thing and you're only allowed two."

"What would you take?" she asked her dad, who was reading the paper. "What would I take where?" he asked, not being interested in reality TV shows.

"To the jungle. If you were on I'm A Celebrity - Get Me Out Of Here."

"Oh, that rubbish. I would take a copy of the bush trekker's survival guide, which I would have spent reading two weeks before I went to the jungle and a fishing rod. That way, when everybody failed to do the trials for food I could go fishing. Mind you, I wouldn't share it with anyone.

"But that would be mean and selfish," said daughter. "No it wouldn't. It would be mean and shellfish," quipped her dad.

"In that case," I chipped in, "my two luxury items would be a notebook with a photo of you and your dad on the cover with an integral pen and my second item would be your dad so he could find me food."

"But you can't take a person," daughter said. "That's not a luxury item.

"The amount of money you cost us each month means you are a luxury item," her dad told her.

The conversation continued in this vein for the rest of the show. It's a good job we are not celebrities and so are highly unlikely to be invited to go to the jungle anyway.

I think we would be better of doing a show called I'm A Couch Potato - Pass The Crisps.