The poor relation; Lager frenzies; Bond of silence; Inquiry vote

Radio Four wants me to go on air to explain the difference between Brighton and Hove. Not that outsiders like myself are really qualified to speak on the matter. I've lived hereabouts for only 12 years.

What the network's Westminster Hour really wants to know, I fancy, is why voters in the Tory stronghold of Hove elected Labour's Ivor Caplin as MP in 1997 - and are they going to do the same again next time? All eyes will be on Hove in the election, which could come next year, because of that sensational result in 1997.

News that it had fallen to Labour for the first time led Tony Blair to exclaim: "Now I know we've won." Can Ivor, one of Westminster's rising stars, hold the line against his lively Tory opponent, last year's mayor, Jenny Langston? It is going to be some battle - Ivor's majority was a slender 3,959.

Tories dominated politics in this area for a century and Labour failed to win a single seat in Brighton until 1964 - and then only after seven recounts. In 1951 Hove recorded the biggest Tory majority in Britain, 24,296 for Anthony Marlow.

Against this background, Radio Four wants to know about life in Hove Actually, now it has merged with Brighton, how the people differ from Brightonians and whether Hove will be good or bad news for Labour next time round?

There was a time when I didn't think much separated the two towns, but since they became uneasy bedfellows I have a feeling posh Hove is gradually becoming Brighton's poor neighbour. Business is booming in Brighton - look at yesterday's record figures - and the town centre and seafront have been regenerated.

While bold, brash Brighton gets the attention, quiet and genteel Hove hides away like a shy spinster. Those of us who live in Hove make up a third of the overall population and pour millions into the council's coffers, but there's little sign of a third of revenue coming our way.

Our seafront has received little more than a lick of paint and the best we can offer visitors is pitch and putt and a bowling green. We used to bump into beach inspectors and even lifeguards while taking our daily constitutional. I've not seen either since the merger.

Cyclists galore ignore the No Cycling signs and we now have traffic wardens. Free parking zones are fading fast. Brighton and Hove's official guide has 82 pages - Hove's entries wouldn't fill two of them. To be fair, over the years snooty Hove looked down on Brighton and fiercely opposed any attempt to merge the towns. Westminster forced them to kiss and make up in 1997.

Lager frenzies hide a larger problem

It frightens me to see the way my youngest son and his friends find so much pleasure in getting tanked up on pints of lager. Apparently students like them spend about £20 a week on booze, which they can ill afford.

Ask them what's the point getting totally legless and back comes the

parrot cry: "Because it's what we do." The same answer greeted reporters following up last week's shock report by Alcohol Concern, revealing a third of men and nearly a quarter of women under the age of 24 regularly drink at least twice the recommended intake of alcohol.

Drinking by women is up by 50 per cent in two years and kids between the ages of 11 and 15 are boozing twice as much. Clearly alcohol is a drug and the Government should crack down on it just like the other drugs we hear about every day. Fat chance. The Treasury relies too much on all that lovely lolly. So it's a case of do nowt apart from a few pious words. Just like tobacco.

Bond of silence

Who needs publicity? Not Sean Connery, that's for sure. He's made it a sacred duty not to talk to reporters, but silence is golden in his case.

He's far and away Britain's biggest movie star. Once again the newspapers are raking over what happened in a Spanish hotel 35 years ago when he beat up his wife, Diane Cilento, presumably for chatting to a young Spaniard.

She went public on the beating after their divorce in 1973. Connery pledged never again to talk to the Press about his private life. Coming up for 70, his career continues to flourish. Next July he receives his greatest accolade when he goes to the Palace to collect his knighthood.

Inquiry vote?

It's quite scandalous to witness the way Labour's ruling group on Brighton and Hove Council dumped two of its leading ladies for no good reason without allowing them to defend themselves.

I would have torn up my party card in their shoes, but councillors Heather James and Joyce Edmond-Smith remain loyal to Labour and say there is no question of their resigning as councillors. Joyce chaired the scrutiny board on culture and lifelong learning. Her post will be offered to the Tory opposition. Heather was lead councillor for parks and open spaces, now to be run by committee.

When I spoke to them at the weekend both ladies were waiting for council leader Lynette Gwyn-Jones to meet them to explain why they were stripped of their jobs. I fancy they'll be waiting a long time since the Labour leadership is not going to voice what we all think - they were chopped for voting in favour of the Argus campaign for an inquiry into Brighton's child cruelty case.

Converted for the new archive on 30 June 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.