The economic downturn has sadly led to a number of eating establishments folding around the city. In my view, the Parent Pound is still strong currency around these parts but frustratingly eating out with toddlers can be a harrowing experience. If you’re looking for a way to pull in more revenue, here’s my tips for getting the buggies strolling in:

1. Only one high chair for the whole establishment? Come on, even the booster style ones that slot into seats can’t cost that much. I don’t want to feed my child sitting on my knee, I’ve got a clean jumper on and I don’t pack two suitcases for an excursion with my child, despite what you may have heard.

2. Don’t sit me or my child near a couple on a romantic lunch. It may be ok for his ring tone to shoot off ‘A Town Called Malice’ every 2 minutes but when my darling daughter cries it’s evil glares all round.

3. If you have a children’s menu (and if you’re reading this, you better had), make the portions properly small, or offer to make a smaller sized version of anything on the main menu. I hate waste and you’ll make more profit.

4. Ditto for drinks. Bringing a toddler a tall tumbler of apple juice poured to measure from a big carton is ridiculous.

5. When we say ‘we’d like the bill please’, we mean there’s a two minute warning until general screaming and tears of boredom from our child. Standing at the bar with your fellow server and gossiping just aggravates mummy, which in turn will set off child and ruin all the remaining customers’ dining experience.

6. The child will drop food on the floor. Deal with it. Smile at the parents and say ‘don’t worry, we deal with it all the time’ and you’ll get a good tip.

7. If you don’t want parents and buggies in your establishment then be honest. Don’t welcome us in, let us seat ourselves and then decide to tell us off for blocking the walkways. Provide a space for buggies, most of us can fold them. (the darling trendy green grocers/eaterie Bill's are the worst)

8. If I’m having a glass of wine, on my own with baby, take pity but don‘t look pitiful or stern. The food will soak up the alcohol and it’s probably been a challenging morning.

9. Ante-natal groups are a goldmine. They will meet up every week for coffee, cake, lunch and yes, again, some wine. Turn your ears off to the details of mastitis, leaky nipples and mustard nappies and watch them loyally roll in week after week for their mummy meetups. Tootsies is closed so someone should be poised to take their place.

10. Check out the competition: as much as I try to frequent and support local business, some of chain restaurants have got the kid thing buttoned down so much better - take a look! Giraffe’s food is nothing special but they make us so welcome and Carluccios were a haven in half-term they were happy for us drink tea or coffee all afternoon. Even relatively small premises like Waikikamookau (Kensington Gardens), The Chilli Pickle (Meeting House Lane) and Moksha (York Place) lay out the red carpet for families. Special mention should also go to: Metro Deco (St James’ Street), Love fit (Sussex Square, although space is limited inside) and Home (Egremont Place), all local businesses creating a pleasant parent vibe.

Plus if you’re a parent reading this don’t be afraid to give feedback after a meal good or bad. Only this way can the staff really know how to make things better.